Hello all. I haven't logged on an awhile. My boyfriend is triggered at this time and sometimes I tend to withdraw and quiet down, as I once again wrap my head around what is happening.
Robbie, I haven't replied much to you, but I do read and am moved plenty by your words. I just hope you understand that there are many supportive women here who would NEVER think of calling SURVIVORS imposters NOR rejects. I know you know this
I am grateful I came across a book that someone mentioned on this site entitled: Allies in Healing. Along with this site, this book has helped me tremendously in understanding his triggered episodes. I would like to share a passage from this book in hopes that it can help you couples struggling with the effects of CSA or even those contemplating starting a relationship in the future...
"Part of any relationship is dealing with the trials each of you goes through in life. Your trial right now is sexual abuse, but it might have been some other grief. Your partner could have become sick and died. You might have developed a debilitating disability. You might have lost a child or been unable to conceive one. There are many tragedies and challenges in life, and you don't get to choose which ones cross your path. At least with sexual abuse, you're dealing with a problem which can be, to a large extent, resolved...You can choose to fight or you can walk away. Walking away doesn't guarantee that you won't be thrown another wild card in the course of your life -- you will be, inevitably."