I joined here a couple of years ago, because I met a man and wanted to understand him. I'm not going to get more specific than that.
When I came, because he and I weren't dating, and because I wasn't married to him, and because he kept throwing obstacles in front of me getting to know him (even though he tried to make my acquaintance first), while some folks were friendly and helpful, most were disdainful and cruel. Some kindly suggested I give up and move on.
Well, I ignored all those suggestions. I ignored all the putdowns. And boy, am I glad I did. We still aren't anything that anyone here thinks is important, but what we are doing is important to me, and more and more to him. It's all one step forward, two back, then 1 forward, etc. etc.
I want to especially thank Allen a/k/a Pufferfish, for he's been the kindest and most helpful. Most helpful, in that he's been the most insightful. I guess it takes one to know one.
I keep coming here to get more insights and more information. But I no longer expect understanding or help. He and I are outside the realm of y'all's experience, and that's saying something. He and I are both very independent creatures, and it turns out that is a really necessary thing.
Before I had no idea where this might lead. Now, I am seeing several definite possible outcomes. It's a great thing.