So, I'm new here and I'm looking for some advice/guidance. I've been married for 10 years to a recovering alcoholic/drug addict and have dealt with the countless relapses over the years. I have survived my husband's destructive behavior: putting our child in danger, putting himself in danger, having all of my jewelry stolen, and worst of all, the whittling away of my trust in our relationship. A couple of weeks ago, during one of his relapses, my husband blurted out to me that he had been abused by his father as a child. On one hand, I was stunned, and on the other hand, a whole lot of things are making sense: the relationship dynamic between he and his father (fear, always wanting acceptance), the years and years of destructive behavior through addiction, etc.
Our marriage at this point (as a result of his constant relapses and refusal to get help) is hanging on by a thread. He has been through rehab 3 times in his past, was clean and sober when we married and he's slipped back into complete denial.
I would do ANYTHING to help him get through this, but I'm afraid to address the abuse issue with him because I don't want to stir up those awful emotions for him. I'm at a complete loss, but want to save our marriage for me and our 2 young boys.