Does anyone here get triggered by tickling? Either because it's unwanted touch or because tickling was used in context of abuse?
The man who abused me tickled me for long stretches of time. That's how the abuse started. He was supposed to be giving me a bath, and he would tickle me in various areas. I was on a ventilator and he removed the valve that allowed me to speak, so instead of the usual burst of laughter, his tickling was met by silence. It was gut-wrenching, to have someone tickle you like that without being able to scream.
My little cousin was over once and she tried tickling me to "make me smile." It was a normal thing cute little kids do, and normally I would have laughed and tickled her back. But instead of laughing I burst into tears and couldn't stop screaming.
And just now, I watched my wife playing with our little baby boy. She was putting on his socks and shoes, and she tickled his toes. Instead of making me smile, it made me cry and it made her VERY confused. She doesn't know the full extent of what my perp did and she doesn't know about the tickling.
This happened a few hours ago but even still, I can't stop shaking. My whole body feels full of this tension that never got released, and I don't know how to release it other than crying, which is the LAST thing I want to be doing.