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#340360 - 09/17/10 11:59 AM not wishing to talk about it?
traillius Offline

Registered: 04/21/10
Posts: 261
sometimes I just want to focus on other things, so I don't have to talk, type, or think too much about my csa. I am not talking about disassociation, denial, or blocking it out. I am not trying to put the genie back in the bottle. Only taking a break from 'it.' I am not leaving here, I mean in general. Besides, only you guys can really understand. And sometimes we all need a break from pain.

#340361 - 09/17/10 12:12 PM Re: not wishing to talk about it? [Re: traillius]
FormerTexan Offline

Site Administrator

Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11998
Loc: Denver, CO
There is wisdom in what you say here. We can't process this stuff 24/7. Otherwise we can get caught in a loop and rehash like crazy, and just get exhausted. While processing and healing is important, down time is important to get out of those valleys and just enjoy life. Go for a hike, see a movie, whatever - something that is a break from the hard work of recovery.


Edited by FormerTexan (09/17/10 12:15 PM)

Money talks, but all it tells me is goodbye.

If I could meet myself as a boy...

#340391 - 09/18/10 07:41 AM Re: not wishing to talk about it? [Re: FormerTexan]
fhorns Offline

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 700
I need that too.


#340399 - 09/18/10 09:48 AM Re: not wishing to talk about it? [Re: fhorns]
prisonerID Offline
Greeter Emeritus

Registered: 02/17/08
Posts: 1247
Loc: Oklahoma
We all need a break from the issues we deal with so much of the time. It actually is good therapy to just get away from it. We can come back to it with a fresh perspective and maybe even a bit rested.

Good for you in taking care of yourself that way.

Broad statements often miss their true mark.

#340416 - 09/18/10 02:31 PM Re: not wishing to talk about it? [Re: prisonerID]
pkincrisi Offline

Registered: 04/08/10
Posts: 96
Loc: Wisconsin
I agree with the fresh perspective comments prisonerID made. I've been MIA a lot this summer from being sick, starting a new job, etc. But I'm glad to know that my brothers will be here for me when I need them. I don't want to take that or any of my brothers for granted.


Make the most of yourself, for that is all there is of you. -- Ralph Waldo Emerson

#340418 - 09/18/10 03:35 PM Re: not wishing to talk about it? [Re: pkincrisi]
ericc Offline

Registered: 01/04/08
Posts: 1986
What all the other guys have said. Giving yourself a break from constant focus on what happened is a *great* thing. At first we sometimes just can't get it off our minds even just for a little bit. It is constantly there and that is why we sought out recovery and some sort of healing. But as we heal and talk about it, it loses some of its iron-fisted grip it used to have over our lives. We can start to dedicate more mental space to other things in life. We can start living. It will never fully disappear or magically be totally gone. But we can take breaks from the constant focus and can start to experience the things in life we could not when it controlled so much in our lives. And yes, stepping back a bit can generate fresh perspectives. I have read that musicians often need to take a break from playing so they can come back to their instruments renewed and open to new possibilities. I think the same goes with recovery from sexual abuse.



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