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#310902 - 11/19/09 01:12 AM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: Logan]
just me Offline

Registered: 05/27/09
Posts: 200

My Story

#311083 - 11/20/09 06:18 AM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: just me]
Logan Offline

Registered: 04/05/03
Posts: 1368
Loc: NY
I don't know how I feel about what i posted being up here in the public realm.

I may keep it up for just another week or few days.

Hopefully is helps someone, but it makes me feel a little uncomfortable.


BTW, than you, just me.

"Terrible thing to live in Fear"-Shawshank Redemption
WOR Alumnus Hope Springs 2009
"Quite a thing to live in fear, this is what is means to be a slave"
-Blade Runner

#311088 - 11/20/09 06:34 AM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: Logan]
pufferfish Offline

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA

I had a negative experience with a physician at a boy scout camp. I was 12. It was in 1951. In this case the Dr. examined all the boys coming into the camp (guessing about 120 boys). Even though the boys had already been examined by their own Dr. with a signed statement of health, this Dr. had to test all boys for a "rupture." To do this, he had all boys remove all clothing and briefs and stand in a long line. Then he inserted his finger under the scrotum and told us to caugh. What I believe to have been the top administrator of the camp and one other person were watching as all the boys went by for "testing". The Dr. was a young guy and may have been an intern. This procedure was obviously unnecessary and hence perverted. He was the guy I told when the severe molestation of me started by another guy. If the Dr. had acted properly he could have saved me from a horrible and very damaging experience. (pufferfish story part 5 - don't read it) I think this would make him legally culpable.


pufferfish whistle

#311151 - 11/20/09 06:10 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: pufferfish]
just me Offline

Registered: 05/27/09
Posts: 200
I think part of what makes these situations so difficult is identifying 'intent' A Dr. can always use the justification of a necessary exam...and without knowing whats going on in the Dr.s head we can't tell if it was 'abusive' or 'medically necessary'. And even if it is medically necessary the Dr. could still have 'intent' but it may not feel as bad to the kid. So it is all very confusing.

Thanks all for the responses, so far, it seems as though I am a lot less alone than I thought.

Thanks for sharing something so difficult...I also hope it helps others AND you as well. The sad part is... what if she meant well? Maybe she was trying to uncover 'CSA' I agree it is misguided to traumatize a child to identify trauma. Nowadays (at special centers some police departments use) when a child is examined after CSA they do a physical exam...but there is A LOT of explanation as to what is going to be done and why. Sorry, I don't mean to justify what was is very sad and painful.
Just me

My Story

#311162 - 11/20/09 07:36 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: Logan]
onlyakid Offline

Registered: 03/31/04
Posts: 1577
Loc: New Jersey
No, I don't remember any touching of my private area during a sick visit.

"Being with people that understand you...Priceless"

"and i don't want the world to see me, cause i don't think that they'd understand"

"You don't know what love just do as your told"

"My life has changed. What you take as a simple thing, is not so simple for me anymore"

#311183 - 11/20/09 10:18 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: just me]
westchesterguy Offline

Registered: 11/14/09
Posts: 421
Loc: Westchester County NY
Originally Posted By: just me
When you were a child (age 8-18) did a medical Doctor ever check private areas during a 'sick visit'?



#311186 - 11/20/09 11:05 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: westchesterguy]
Dusty Boy Offline

Registered: 11/15/08
Posts: 280
Loc: Australia
When I was a small child somewhere before 6 years old I had a penis problem and had to have surgery at the children's hospital, other than that my family Dr never inspected my genitals.

Back in the 50's the school Dr gave all 11yo children a physical, he did it matter in a of fact way and we all knew that he was going to give the hernia cough test. We all were worried that we may get an erection and find that embarrassing. None of us felt abused as we knew that this would happen and he did do it so professionally.

I think if it seemed like it was part of a routine visit then that was not normal and I would call it abuse.


#311189 - 11/20/09 11:44 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: Dusty Boy]
jls Offline

Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
When I was five I got my penis stuck in my zipper and had to go to the emergency ward to have it "released". I have a vague recollection of a nurse or doctor injecting freezing into it prior to the procedure. While the experience was traumatic it wasn't abusive. JS

Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.

#322997 - 02/22/10 10:05 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: jls]
just me Offline

Registered: 05/27/09
Posts: 200
Since there are many new here (and so few answered before) I just wanted to try and bump this thread.

Thanks...please see the first post above.

My Story

#322998 - 02/22/10 10:15 PM Re: Was I abused? PART 2 - You can help [Re: just me]
kidneythis Offline

Registered: 11/09/09
Posts: 1558
Yes ish.

I had hernia check where they tuck a finger up into the skin just above the scrotum. "turn your head and cough"

I think a couple guys checked my gonads. I can't say my feeling off was related as I had been abused so young everything felt off to me then. It took a long time to realize most of those off feelings were unattached feelings related to the abuse, in fact that is the first time I thought of it and said that about it. Huh! thanks

Oh yea I forgot to mention that they ahd an interest in seeing how my penis was doing since the damage was so bad with the tournequet. That stopped after foster care started. I remember most doctors didn't want to go near me with my pants off.
Hope this helped.

Edited by kidneythis (02/22/10 10:30 PM)
As Mark Twain once quipped, history may not repeat itself, but it does rhyme.

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