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#303344 - 09/20/09 01:21 AM Tadd Garrison
pufferfish Offline

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
I've been a little sad about Tadd Garrison
So I found this conversation I had with him in chat the day after Christmas in 2008. I have edited it a little bit. The conversation comforts me about him a lot.

[Tadd] 10:59 pm: yeah I've seen him in here before a few times
[Tadd] 11:01 pm: well school's also out for many of them so I know that they come here alot more since
[Tadd] 11:01 pm: ginger said he's a boy
[pufferfish] 11:01 pm: Yeah! Sometimes we can't be sure
[Tadd] 11:02 pm: he said the name is that of his dog
[pufferfish] 11:02 pm: That makes sense. I have known people who'se dog was named ginger
[Tadd] 11:03 pm: what is a PSA? I know what the CSA is but never heard of the other one before
[pufferfish] 11:04 pm: PSA = pounds per square inch
[Tadd] 11:04 pm: that's PSI isn't it?
[pufferfish] 11:04 pm: Oh yes, Ahhhh!!! You shot me down!
[pufferfish] 11:05 pm: just joking lol lol lol :††††
[pufferfish] 11:05 pm: Here's Li
[Tadd] 11:06 pm: yuppers Li
[pufferfish] 11:07 pm: It sounds like we have stuff in common. Are you fairly new to MS?
[Tadd] 11:08 pm: yes
[pufferfish] 11:08 pm: perhaps Tinel is a kid
[Tadd] 11:09 pm: he's 25 and extremely religious
[pufferfish] 11:10 pm: Oh! You might say I am religious. I was suffocated during abuse when I was 12. I had a "near-death" experience. Surrounded by light. Then I came back alive
[pufferfish] 11:10 pm: thanks
[Tadd] 11:11 pm: same for me when I almost died
[pufferfish] 11:11 pm: Ohhhhhhhhhhhhh!
[pufferfish] 11:11 pm: You saw light?
[pufferfish] 11:11 pm: all around
[Tadd] 11:11 pm: yes and floating in space and voice
[pufferfish] 11:12 pm: I believe God brought me back. Later I found salvation through Christ.
[pufferfish] 11:12 pm: God keeps me going. I believe he teaches me
[Tadd] 11:13 pm: well I believe the same thing and heard it in my head before I was returned actually
[pufferfish] 11:13 pm: You heard what in your head?
[Tadd] 11:14 pm: me being told that it wasn't my time yet and I remembered answering that I didn't want to
go back..the next thing I was back with some doctor putting a needle in my arm

[pufferfish] 11:14 pm: Words from God?
[Tadd] 11:15 pm: yes or an angel of the Lords
[pufferfish] 11:15 pm: I believe that. There is a guy in my church (a doctor) who has compiled these kinds
of testimonies into a book. Somebody gave me the book but I don't have it anymore.
[pufferfish] 11:16 pm: I don't remember any words during my experience but there may have been some.
[pufferfish] 11:16 pm: So you were abused and what - - - taken to a hospital?
[Tadd] 11:17 pm: yes I was abused many times but a lot of people before trying to take my life then when I
was brought back I was put in a hospital for 3 years
[pufferfish] 11:18 pm: You were very depressed
[Tadd] 11:19 pm: yeah, to say the least
[pufferfish] 11:20 pm: It is helping me so much to talk to you and the others in the main Lounge. But I'm
terribly sorry you had to go through so much
[Tadd] 11:20 pm: well that's my cross to bare I guess
[Tadd] 11:21 pm: but thank you anyway
[pufferfish] 11:22 pm: Wow! It makes me want to know more about your experiences. I now think my perp
at age 12 must have been a psychopath.
[Tadd] 11:22 pm: he could have been
[pufferfish] 11:23 pm: How many perps did you have?
[Tadd] 11:24 pm: thru all my life or just in those years I specified?
[pufferfish] 11:25 pm: I had a bunch of perps over the years. I wrote pufferfish stories 1,2,3,4,and 5 and 6
is yet to come. Different perps from ages 4 to 13
[Tadd] 11:25 pm: about 18 or so in my early years
[pufferfish] 11:25 pm: including my grandfather
[Tadd] 11:26 pm: ditto here
[pufferfish] 11:26 pm: wow! you've got me beat
[Tadd] 11:26 pm: he's the main one everyweekend of my life
[pufferfish] 11:26 pm: I feel like I have known you a long time by now
[Tadd] 11:26 pm: sorry you were hurt by them
[pufferfish] 11:27 pm: me too. and I express the same sorry to you
[Tadd] 11:27 pm: thx
[pufferfish] 11:27 pm: abuse kind of ruins our lives
[Tadd] 11:27 pm: douglas is busy PMing me tonight so I guess the main chat room is spared for a little
while longer
[Tadd] 11:27 pm: yes it does
[pufferfish] 11:28 pm: My dog is asking me to take him out so I may have to go on BRB status. If it
pleases you, keep this window open and I'll be back
[Tadd] 11:28 pm: oh ok

posted by Allen

pufferfish whistle

Edited by pufferfish (09/21/09 07:36 PM)
Edit Reason: Joshua_33 changed to pufferfish

#303351 - 09/20/09 03:26 AM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: pufferfish]
Freedom49 Offline

Registered: 12/31/07
Posts: 2724
Loc: Washington State
You wrestled with demons I canít comprehend.
You wept when I talked of my pain.
You reached out to me and became my friend.
You even shared your real name.

You laughed at my jokes
You let me complain
You were down home folks.
Helping others keep sane.

Sometimes you were hurt.
And misunderstood.
You could be curt.
But most times you saw good.

Even though you had torments
You always had time
To reach out in moments
And help me with mine.

Only now I can see
The depth of your caring.
Friend Tadd, I miss thee.
And friendship we were sharing.

Up there are no fears
Sad memories have faded.
Though here there are tears.
From friendships vacated.

Rest in peace Tadd/Garrison

#303414 - 09/20/09 08:15 PM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: Freedom49]
michael banks Offline

Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca
Tadd Garrison,

Know that you will be missed my friend. You were the first guy that I got to know when I first started going into the chatroom.
Thanks for making me feel welcome with your friendly manner with which you interacted with me.
You are gone but not forgottened.
Enjoy the rest of your journey.


To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009

#303621 - 09/22/09 03:29 AM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: michael banks]
DJsport Offline

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
OMG - I just realized a bit ago who Tadd was.

Like lots of us here - we never get to know others personal identities.

But I knew a Tadd and now I know Tadds full name.

RIP - my friend.

Peace, DJ

Live to your fullest potential

Never make someone a priority if your only an option

#307138 - 10/19/09 08:10 PM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: DJsport]
duncanUK Offline

Registered: 12/24/06
Posts: 632
I miss Tadd, it hurts. I talked to him on the phone and i was going to see him next year. I always looked forward to talking with him on yahoo every evening, now its empty.

I listen to Louis Armstrongs "what a wonderful world". i miss you hurts that i keep loosing friends.

you dont see me. i am not really here. Its my fault.. all of it. I am to blame and no one else.

#307185 - 10/20/09 01:16 AM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: duncanUK]
FormerTexan Offline

Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 12156
Loc: Denver, CO
He was thoughtful. I miss that. I miss him.

Money talks, but all it tells me is goodbye.

If I could meet myself as a boy...

#307195 - 10/20/09 02:13 AM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: FormerTexan]
DJsport Offline

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
He called me during a HC. I was in a bad spot. I did not want to bring him down. He probably needed someone to talk with.

How could I have helped him? Did he need to talk? I tried calling him back. I know he wanted to talk. Could I have and just told myself I can't.

Live to your fullest potential

Never make someone a priority if your only an option

#307396 - 10/21/09 03:05 AM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: DJsport]
Shadow+Walker Offline

Registered: 04/17/09
Posts: 287
Loc: desolate foggy nights, USA
Hey guys,
Sorry for your loss. It hurts to lose friends; I know for sure. I extend my thoughts and prayers. It sounds like Tadd was a great guy and I wish I had the chance to get to know him, better. May he have peace eternal+

Thanks for being here, you make a difference to untold numbers who secretly come to MS for encouragement, plus those of us who sign up. Thanks again.


For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, love and self discipline. (St Paul, 2Timothy 1:7) NIV

Check out a cool song by a hot band..."Unbreakable" by Fireflight: official video at

#307449 - 10/21/09 02:18 PM Re: Tadd Garrison [Re: Shadow+Walker]
michael Joseph Offline

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
Weird thing is we talked a lot from time to time.

I never found out he died till today.

Very sad to lose a friend.



Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
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