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#302067 - 09/07/09 09:05 PM Out of Place
tboy85 Offline

Registered: 08/31/09
Posts: 12
I feel more isolated today than usual and the loneliness is just eating away at me. I went out to dinner with some friends (first time going out in a long time) and I was reminded why I have become such a recluse. Everything was so loud and so bright and all I wanted to do was hide. I've always felt a sense of isolation and being set apart from everyone else and I hate it. I hate that I can't just fit in, it's almost as if I am not meant to live in this world (but then again who really is). OK stopping the whining now.

#302080 - 09/07/09 11:59 PM Re: Out of Place [Re: tboy85]
DJsport Offline

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
Hi, Tboy85.

I am sorry you feel so isolated. I know I do at times as well.

I am wondering if the sensations your having are a mere adjustment back into socialization with others as you mentioned this being the first time out in a long time.

I do not like being in places that are too loud and bright as well.

I know as I move through "recovery" my false sense of being I attribute to isolation.

BTW - Welcome to MS.


Live to your fullest potential

Never make someone a priority if your only an option

#302115 - 09/08/09 03:31 AM Re: Out of Place [Re: tboy85]
Sans Logos Offline

Registered: 05/31/03
Posts: 5796
Loc: in my own world in pittsburgh,...
hi tboy,

it's pretty typical for those of us dealing with the double whammy of csa/sa AND the gay blessing to feel this way.

from talking with friends about this, i've found, in some cases, depending on one's family, or local cultural influences, since we're already made to feel pretty worthless because of our non-traditional orientation, it's hard to keep our own self-esteem level high, especially where do not find ourselves supported by a network of people who have our best emotional and psychological interests at heart.

i have found the most important way to counter these negative thoughts and feelings is to stay well connected to a supportive community, people who will listen when i need to talk about anything.

do you have a therapist? it's really difficult to work out these issues on your own. maybe that's something to consider?

at any rate, please just know, that you are not unique in this regard, and if you explore, you'll find lots of threads here talking about how survivors pretty much across the board share this characteristic, no matter what their background.

all the best,


Ron Schulz, MSPC, NCC


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