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#293881 - 07/02/09 03:00 AM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: Shadow+Walker]
Shadow+Walker Offline

Registered: 04/17/09
Posts: 287
Loc: desolate foggy nights, USA

I also want to say, congratulations on your breakthrough. It is so cool when it happens. It doesn't happen on its own, but through hard work and determination. The only thing we can't control is when the moment arrives and when it does it takes us by surprise.

Here is a video from my heart to yours to celebrate with. I didn't post it, just found it. Click here:


For God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but a spirit of power, love and self discipline. (St Paul, 2Timothy 1:7) NIV

Check out a cool song by a hot band..."Unbreakable" by Fireflight: official video at

#293890 - 07/02/09 03:33 AM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: Casmir213]
pufferfish Offline

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Happy late Birthday Charlie laugh laugh laugh

Sorry I missed it


pufferfish whistle

#294020 - 07/03/09 05:54 AM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: pufferfish]
Logan Offline

Registered: 04/05/03
Posts: 1368
Loc: NY
Happy B-Day Charlie. Sorry i missed it as well.
25 huh. i think that was a pretty good year for me, hope it is for you too. I'm 28 and made a lot of progress since then.

I definitely have to agree with what Larry said in that the number of replies a post gets does NOT make it more or less valuable even though it does seem like that much of the time.

I know for myself that I usually don't receive many replies. I just attribute it to the way I feel about many posts here--Often I will read a post and receive a lot of help and support from it but I won't know exactly how to reply so I just don't.
In fact, most of the help I get from MS is just from reading other people's posts and just the ability to express myself.

I agree though that seeing that other people have replied makes it seems like they care more. I will try to be more responsive to to you and keep you on the lookout.

Take care and feel better,

"Terrible thing to live in Fear"-Shawshank Redemption
WOR Alumnus Hope Springs 2009
"Quite a thing to live in fear, this is what is means to be a slave"
-Blade Runner

#294162 - 07/04/09 07:22 AM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: Logan]
nomansanisland Offline

Registered: 02/03/09
Posts: 156
Loc: NM
happy bday charlie...i just want you to know that youre loved here, and part of my day each day. wishing you all the love taht you give to others...remember, if you are not for you than who???
patrick nomansanisland...

" If a man does not keep pace with his companions, perhaps it is because he hears a different drum. Let him step to the music he hears, however measured or far away." Henry David Thoreau

#294413 - 07/06/09 08:03 PM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: Casmir213]
Barney Offline

Registered: 07/31/06
Posts: 236
Loc: Southern Utah/Northern Arizon

I am one of your biggest fans here. Not sure how I missed the birthday and you have every right to be acknowledged by those of us who care. Will do better next time.

Glad your speaking up for what you need and want. Nice to see you doing that as it is further eveidence of you continue to get better at taking care of you. A good example for the rest of us.



#294419 - 07/06/09 08:57 PM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: Barney]
DJsport Offline

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 1742
Happy Birthday Charlie.

Wow. What a great post. I almost did not respond out of fear. I fear anger and responding to anger. But, I realize rage was the "feeling" expressed not anger in my family.

We do not know each very well so hopefully you not take my forgetting your birthday personally. Although, It has been said to me "notice me" by others I have NO clue sometimes.

In my family of origin, personal holidays like birthdays are a day to be shamed NOT a day of celebration. I felt ashamed for even having a birthday and even at age 8 if I voiced a want for a present I was told how do you think you are. I have had 45 birthdays. The adults in my family say I do not celebrate my birthday as birthdays are for kids.

Also, I am not sure how to see birthdays in this website.

I do care for you and for your recovery. You are an inspiration. I would have like to have been like you when I was 25.


Edited by DJsport (07/06/09 09:02 PM)
Live to your fullest potential

Never make someone a priority if your only an option

#331889 - 05/24/10 07:39 AM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: DJsport]
Charlie24 Offline

Registered: 09/28/08
Posts: 562
Hey guys I just wanna say I'm not trying to highjack Male Survivor or the threads this evening/morning depending on where you are at in our world. I have a lot to say right now. I just have to be more assertive in my life. Say what I mean and feel and I'm feeling a lot right now.

I had a realization tonight about myself. I allow myself to fall back into old patterns and then try and pull out the I'm a victim of csa card. Well it's gotta stop.

I have to take responsibility for myself, be assertive, stand up for me, for Charlie. Stand up for that scared little boy.

A great friend here, no longer with the site unfortunately, reminded me about progress in our recovery. Yes I do believe this may be a life long battle for myself with moving forward. He said to me, you have to look back and really see how far you've come in your recovery. Well guess what this post showed me how to look back and see how far I've come, how much I've grown and I really do owe a big thanks to Male Survivor, better than any of the shitty therapists I've seen in my past, but I also owe a big thanks that guy named Charlie. For the progress he's made in his life and for the goals and accomplishments he is achieving, his willing to stick with it even when times get tough and hang on with the hopes of succeeding in life, and in college and in recovery.

It's funny reading the title of this topic, cause in a way I'm pissed off again, not at you guys, no I think it may be more internally directed, but I have to let this anger out, I can't let it eat me up inside and make me a bitter old man. No thank you I want to live a long and healthy life.

Seeing this post, reading my other posts, I hope that this can be a beacon for all the men who have made progress and are making progress. Remember to look back and see how far you've come.

Okay it's getting late here and it's time for bed.


#331892 - 05/24/10 08:47 AM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: Charlie24]
sono Offline

Registered: 07/19/09
Posts: 1069
Hey Charlie,

In case I'm not on site on the 30th...Happy Birthday!! in advance. Good to "see" you again. That's a big step when you admit you've even used the victim card let alone make the conscious determination to not use it. You're not just gonna be a survivor, but a thriver!


the family
the perp

#333790 - 06/15/10 12:33 PM Re: I'm really pissed off..... (May Trigger Warning) [Re: sono]
fhorns Offline

Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 706
Yeah, Charlie, I found this post looking up "victim" here since I have been using "the card". I've got to find out when/why I pull it out. I will be reading more posts, because being MAD is not the same as playing the victim. Bullshit!! Thanks for sharing your struggle. It helped me identify mine as well.

And congrats on your growth. It is a how-to for me and many others. Thank you.


P.S. Happy Belated!

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