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#286097 - 05/02/09 09:00 PM Narcissism
hapati Offline


Registered: 04/06/09
Posts: 40
Loc:

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#286102 - 05/02/09 09:42 PM Re: Narcissism [Re: hapati]
king tut Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/13/08
Posts: 2488
Loc: UK
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#286273 - 05/04/09 10:50 AM Re: Narcissism [Re: hapati]
stan12 Offline


Registered: 03/31/09
Posts: 19
My father, who was my abuser, was narcistic. My therapist explained that it kept my father from really understanding the harm and damage his abuse did to me. From my dad's perspective, it wasn't wrong because my abuse was something to please him.

It's hard to understand but the illness makes people think the world revolves around them.


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#286314 - 05/04/09 10:23 PM Re: Narcissism [Re: stan12]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Yes,

Narcissism is a big problem. My Mother had some strongly narcissistic traits. She didn't abuse me herself. Because she was so wrapped up in herself and her own problems, I was abused a lot outside the home. She was a difficult woman. I am still trying to figure her out.

There are books about narcissistic parents.

Children of the Self Absorbed, by Nina W. Brown:

http://www.amazon.com/Children-Self-Abso...9812&sr=1-2

I'll try to find some other resources for you and for me.

Allen

pufferfish whistle


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#286315 - 05/04/09 10:31 PM Re: Narcissism [Re: pufferfish]
ericc Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 01/04/08
Posts: 1986
I just finished the book "The Mirror Effect". I thought it was pretty interesting and narcissism was the main topic. It probably isn't exactly what you are looking for, but I still found it informative. It mostly deals with celebrity culture and how society mirrors it. I did find it interesting and felt it explained narcissism pretty well and explained where it comes from.


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#286318 - 05/04/09 11:44 PM Re: Narcissism [Re: ericc]
pufferfish Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
Narcissism

I want to explain this a little, so that more guys will understand what we are talking about.

I went to lunch today with some friends. We were waiting for a table and a well-dressed man walked by. He had a neat charcoal suit. His hair was carefully fixed. He walked as though he expected others to move out of his way. He looked toward me briefly, as if to say, "Here I am. You of course will want to look at me and absorb how wonderful I am." I nearly called for the puke bucket because I have been sensitized to narcissistic people in the past. They believe you belong to them. They believe the world revolves around them. The people there are for their own use. They believe that they deserve to be worshipped. If something goes wrong in a relationship with a narcissistic person, they always think it is your fault, never their own fault.

Needless to say they are difficult to deal with. Some have bosses like this. Some have parents like this. Wow!

Allen

pufferfish whistle


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#286322 - 05/05/09 12:37 AM Re: Narcissism [Re: pufferfish]
hapati Offline


Registered: 04/06/09
Posts: 40
Loc:

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#287425 - 05/13/09 11:36 PM Re: Narcissism [Re: hapati]
hapati Offline


Registered: 04/06/09
Posts: 40
Loc:

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#288151 - 05/20/09 02:09 AM Re: Narcissism [Re: hapati]
hapati Offline


Registered: 04/06/09
Posts: 40
Loc:

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#401301 - 06/22/12 02:09 PM Re: Narcissism [Re: hapati]
WriterKeith Offline
Member
MaleSurvivor

Registered: 12/30/10
Posts: 980
Loc: California
Very helpful thread.
_________________________
I have taken to the stand-up comedy stage to educate other male survivors and those who try to love them. I blog about my isolated religious upbringing where physical and sexual abuse were commonplace and I serve as a facilitator of a weekly support group for men who have suffered sexual assault.

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