I too know the solitude of the dark night, and sleep meds give me intense dreams. I stopped dreaming while asleep in the mid 1980's and in Oct/2007 I started to dream again. It was the sleep meds trazadone and ambien that got the dreams started again.
I was unable to tell the diference between wide awake turmoil and asleep nightmares. Thislasted untill almost Nov/2008 even though I was only using the sleep meds as needed.
Now I sleep without dreams most of the times and I guess it just took time and healing to correct the problem.
The dreams were erotic and not scary or related to the abduction/assault, but very realistic. I wrote them down upon awakening in my journal I started in mid-July 2007 after I first started talking about the 1978 assauly.
I was always so boommed out on meds and alcohol trying to numb the pain that I never had anxiety prior to sleep.
I believe I am perfectly normal for what happened to me. It is normal for us to have insomnia and sleep disorder as a result of the trauma.
Google up some info on Rape Related Post-Traumatic Traumatic Stress Disorder, RR-PTSD and some of the research of Dr. David Lisak of the University of Boston. I don't have the same form of abuse he researches but his studies and papers have been a big factor in my understanding.
Keep on Bro
Edited by men_of_hrts.dbw (05/23/09 09:37 AM)
Doug>ASA Survivor (1x)
ECV 6001/MaTuCa Chapter 1849
E Clampus Vitus
"What Say the Brethren"
"Hang the Bastards"