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#285349 - 04/25/09 07:52 PM attention
jls Offline

Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
Does any one here feel like they want attention? On one hand I don't want attention since it attracts trouble but on the other I feel the need to be cared for. On the outside I can easily care for myself (as well as other people) but inside it feels like another story. I guess this is what my counsellor and I were talking about not so long ago, the need to parent and care for oneself I mean.

Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.

#285356 - 04/25/09 09:13 PM Re: attention [Re: jls]
Dusty Boy Offline

Registered: 11/15/08
Posts: 280
Loc: Australia
I do, I want attention, I want to be cared for, I want to be rescued and I want to be understood. I am sick of careing for others and I am sick of being brave.
I am happy that I am here and getting the support from the wonderfull people, that post, share and support me.

#285361 - 04/25/09 10:11 PM Re: attention [Re: Dusty Boy]
petercorbett Offline

Registered: 07/27/08
Posts: 2509
Hi, my brothers/friends.

Yes I do want attention, I want understanding. I want compassion for what we boys had suffered,. I want love from my fellow brothers in pain, for who understands us? Better than us?

As a young boy, the only attention I got was sexual from those male abusers and my "mother" that kind of attention I did not deserve.

Heal well my brothers/friends.

Working Boys' Home 10-14 yrs old, grades 5-8. 1949-1953
A very humble alumni of the WOR Dahlonega, GA.
May 15-17 2009, Alta, Sep. 2009. Sequoia, 2010.
Hope Springs, 2010.

#285399 - 04/26/09 12:06 PM Re: attention [Re: petercorbett]
FormerTexan Offline

Site Administrator

Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11925
Loc: Denver, CO

I believe we all want attention and care in some form or another, in normal healthy relationship. We are relational beings, with a longing for the friendship or intimacy of others. Post-abuse, it is difficult to learn not to have walls up, or the opposite, to have no boundaries at all. Abuse taught us broken relating. Only in new relationships do we learn healthy boundaries and good relating again.

Wanting attention and care of others is certainly legitimate.



Money talks, but all it tells me is goodbye.

If I could meet myself as a boy...

#285464 - 04/27/09 02:12 AM Re: attention [Re: FormerTexan]
Daniel_forgotten Offline

Registered: 02/07/09
Posts: 479
i feel the same as u jls. Attention brings problems. in fact just being around ppl brings problems but at the same time i do want attention i want somebody to b worried about me. (love me is too much to ask) Maybe its because that has never happened bfore in my life (im not whining its just a fact). if it wasnt for this site i'd have given up on ppl. im sick of trying

#285465 - 04/27/09 03:30 AM Re: attention [Re: Daniel_forgotten]
jls Offline

Registered: 03/06/09
Posts: 1142
Agreed that tension brings problems between people, especially when getting to know someone adds to it. I'm sorry that you are sick of trying. Alot of us are but we hang in. For what it's worth I'm worried about no one worrying about you, if that makes any sense. The truth is I'm concerned about you as someone on a message board yet we haven't even met. Does this make any sense? Let me know your thoughts.

Love is better than anger. Hope is better than fear. Optimism is better than despair. So let us be loving, hopeful and optimistic. And we’ll change the world.


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