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#278799 - 03/09/09 04:50 PM No Sexuality
kellygtx Offline

Registered: 07/11/07
Posts: 412
Loc: Texas, USA
I have not been around in awhile feeling like I have a pretty good grip on everything and am doing pretty good - and I am - with everything except sex and sexuality. I know, that is like saying everything at the zoo is OK but the elephant is sick right?

Well, it just seems for about the last 12 months I have had no real sense of sexuality and no desire for sex. In fact I have not had an sort of sexual contact with my wife in now about 9 months. I don't masterbate or look at porn (that was never anything I liked to begin with) - NOTHING. In fact I shower with the lights off and really don't want to ever be without clothes on. I know some will say I have to get used to being sexual or accepting sex in a healthy way but I don't miss it at all - in fact I am pretty comfortable not having to worry about it. When I try to think about something sexual I get no where fast - if I keep trying I just really get nothing...I don't feel anything - there is nothing pleasurable---just nothing.

Is it normal to go through a phase like this?

I bid you Peace.


The time is always NOW. Breath In. Breath Out. Move On.

#278828 - 03/09/09 08:39 PM Re: No Sexuality [Re: kellygtx]
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline

Moderator Emeritus

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5781
Loc: Lyons, CO USA
I suppose if you live by yourself and are comfortable with no sexual interests or responses, it would be fine. However, how does your wife feel about that?

Blissfully retired after 35 years treating sexual abuse

#280404 - 03/22/09 08:20 PM Re: No Sexuality [Re: Ken Singer, LCSW]
myboyhoodfears Offline

Registered: 03/13/09
Posts: 457
i wish i had no sexual's way over rated...more problems than its worth.

Edited by myboyhoodfears (03/22/09 08:20 PM)
Post Nubilia Pheobus

#280412 - 03/22/09 09:43 PM Re: No Sexuality [Re: myboyhoodfears]
FormerTexan Offline

Site Administrator

Registered: 09/12/04
Posts: 11925
Loc: Denver, CO
mbf, I totally agree.


Money talks, but all it tells me is goodbye.

If I could meet myself as a boy...

#280424 - 03/22/09 11:49 PM Re: No Sexuality [Re: FormerTexan]
TJ jeff Offline


Registered: 08/07/04
Posts: 3515
Loc: Northern Wisconsin
I dunno guys....

I mean... I know the feeling well of having no interest whatsoever in sex - I went over 10 years totaly celebit

but... the right woman came along - totaly opened me up - took me to places I did'nt even know I "wanted" to go sexualy untill after I went there...

I guess all I'm trying to say is... life can really change in a big hurry sometimes - the most important thing is to relax and just enjoy the journey

abuse makes it hard for us to just let go though - that's why we need good therapists to work out these issues from the past with

Who will cry for the little boy? - I will... - Antwone Fisher

Abuse happens in silence/isolation - Recovery happens only when that silence/isolation is broken...

TJ's History

#280449 - 03/23/09 07:31 AM Re: No Sexuality [Re: TJ jeff]
michael banks Offline

Registered: 06/12/08
Posts: 1755
Loc: Mojave Desert, Ca

Was that totally celbit? No masturbation or nothing for ten years?
If so, How did you manage that?
I have not masturbated in about ten days and my wife is looking better everyday.


To own one's shadow is the highest moral act of a human.
-Robert Johnson-

"IT ought never be forgotten that the past is the parent of the future" John C. Calhoun

WOR Alumni Sequoia 2009


Moderator:  ModTeam, peroperic2009 

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