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#27127 - 12/10/02 11:45 PM Re: problems with paying for therapy
Lloydy Offline
Administrator Emeritus
Registered: 04/17/02
Posts: 7071
Loc: England Shropshire
I have the same experience as Mark here in the UK.

It's a tale of bad news / good news here.
The bad news is that our National Health ( free service ) provides little or no therapy for people like us, the therapy they provide is done by 'general' therapists and you can wait a long time to see one

The good news is we have a terrific network of charity organizations that provide rape / abuse counselling or therapy. And like Mark says you pay what you can. I work there now, and I know it costs about $60 per hour absolute minimum to keep the service going. But we generally get very little direct off the client.
The National Health does pay for some who are reffered from a doctor, the rest of the shortfall is made from donations and tireless fundraising.

It's a precarious system, but a good one because it's driven from the bottom by people who are concerned and commited.
All we need is better funding.

The system you describe where you need police records to substantiate your claim is dreadful, and seems solely designed to keep people out of expensive therapy.
Who dreamed that one up - some tight-wad politician I guess ?


Go confidently in the direction of your dreams! Live the life you've imagined. As you simplify your life, the laws of the universe will be simpler.
Henry David Thoreau

#27128 - 12/11/02 03:10 PM Re: problems with paying for therapy
Mark S Offline

Registered: 08/25/02
Posts: 130
Loc: England

I agree wholeheartedly with your views on therapy being offered by those that care over here. Even if you are lucky enough to be offered therapy by our NHS, (free at the point of delivery) and that therapist is compitent with the issue's that surround survivors, you only get six sessions then your out on your ear.

I'm a little suprised though, that the charity you work with are given funding via G.P. referals. When I suggested that my G.P. might like to help fund my charity (which is REALLY struggling for cash). I was met with nothing but empty looks. Maybe you could give me a few pointers.

I too was alarmed at the notion of having to file a report against a perp to qualify for funding. I actually find that coercieve and abusive in itself. I know I don't feel confident enough to confront my perp. And I'm reasonably well adjusted, (some may argue) after almost two years of therapy. Had I been forced to confront him at the outset of my therapy, well all I know is I wouldn't be here now.

Mark S

#27129 - 12/12/02 04:19 AM Re: problems with paying for therapy
michael Joseph Offline

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
as for turning him in-----------turning one of my perps in was very difficult, he was still hurting others, if for any reason to turn them in is to stop further abuse and hope they get help.

Sometime perps are relieved once they are caught because they do not know how to stop.

dont look at it as free counseling, you deserve to heal also, many children do not report. I feel that that is an extreamly dumb to require a report as a child in order to recieve help through counseling for the adult survivor. I waited till I was 30.

Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! By the way I had free counseling through abuse programs at the YWCA.


Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

#27130 - 12/12/02 05:28 AM Re: problems with paying for therapy
Stephen_5 Offline
BoD Emeritus
Registered: 09/12/00
Posts: 667
Loc: Northern California Foothills
I also do volunteer work at a local rape crisis center and they offer peer support and low cost/no cost counseling for survivors of either sex. There have been about 5 or 6 calls from men in the year or so that I've been there mostly adults molested as children. I know from personal experience that it is not easy to admit to being assaulted and ask for help even if it happened a long time ago. There are more enlightened rape crisis centers around that recognize that men can be victims too. I hope that you can find one that can help.


I want to stay as close to the edge as I can without going over. Out on the edge you see all kinds of things you can't see from the center.
Kurt Vonnegut (1922-2007)

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