For as long as I remember I have had an involuntary sexual reaction to cruelty.
Often when I witness cruelty I experience the same bodily reaction as when I get sexually aroused.
I always feel my blood pump to my penis twice.
This cruelty can be anything (mostly on TV) from inflicting pain on another, humiliation, physically hurting someone, usually in situations where the perpetrator has power over the victim.
Other than these bodily reactions I don't have anything with cruelty, sexual or otherwise or S&M or anything like that.
My older brother however, has displayed joy in being cruel to other people all his life and as his little brother I was his favorite target.
Also my father had (probably still has) a secret interest in S&M.
I was wondering if I am the only one who experiences crazy things like this or if anyone here is experiencing any bodily reactions like this.
Empty as I am.