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#262914 - 11/20/08 11:32 PM Partner and journalist seeking for help
JuliaM Offline

Registered: 11/18/08
Posts: 7
Hello Everyone,

I am new here and I joined the forum for two main reasons. I am a European who came to USA to stay for some time with my partner before we move back to Europe. We have been together for over four years and it is the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.
Some time ago he confessed to me that as a boy, he was malasted. He seems to go over it quite well on the surface but as I searched for the affecst a sexual abuse of male survivors can have on their partners, I have found out we share some of the similarities.
I was shocked to find out that about one in six man is malasted as a boy in United states and that brought me to my second idea.
In my country, I work as a Deputy Editor in Chief of a great magazine for women and have decided to publish a big story about the sexually abused men.
There has hardly been any discusison about this in our media and I believe popularising the problem may lead to many helps – may help the partners of the survivors to reveal the real reason of complications in their relationship and hopefully it could trigger an establishment of non profit helplines or support groups for the male survivors and their partners.
Though I have been studying the problem already for some time, I would want to get more witnesses to tackle the topic best I can.
I would like to ask anyone from you, a male survivor or a female partner, to share their stories with me. I have prepared a list of questions that I am ready to copy and paste for you to enable you the writing or I will be thanksfull for any story, comment or opinion.
If you could help me in this, please, let me know and I either send you my questions or we will simply talk.
Thank you very much. I wish you all a firm recovery from what you went through... Julia

#262943 - 11/21/08 01:28 AM Re: Partner and journalist seeking for help [Re: JuliaM]
joelRT Offline

Registered: 09/11/08
Posts: 1357
Loc: Québec, Canada
I' d be happy to assist you in any way I can provided that it be clearly understood that male childhhod sexual abuse is about, first and formost, men. Not AND their partners, whether those partners be female or male.

While clearly our partners are directly affected by the impact of our CSA, this is not a partner issue. It is a male CSA issue. I do hope that you will not turn a particularly unique male issue into a women's topic. Oprah Magazine already did that. And I might add to the greater detriment of male victims everywhere.

I for one do greatly appreciate and thank you for your interest and I welcome your intelligent compassion. I only ask that you do not feminize my gang-rape and it's subsequent trauma on my male psyche.

You can PM me if you wish to.

My Story 1
My Story 2
The longest journey we take is to self-discovery

#262946 - 11/21/08 01:36 AM Re: Partner and journalist seeking for help [Re: joelRT]
Ken Singer, LCSW Offline

Registered: 08/24/00
Posts: 5781
Loc: Lyons, CO USA
We have a process for researchers and journalists here that precludes just posting to elicit information. I've passed this on to the mod team and ask you and people here not to respond to the request until we have the information to either allow such a request or have it examined by our team. This is done to prevent any exploitation and although we suspect and hope your motives are legitimate, we need to be sure that such requests are appropriate for this forum.

Also, we request that people not post in this forum unless they are male survivors, so please use the family and friends forum for your postings.
Ken Singer, Moderator

Edited by Ken Singer, LCSW (11/21/08 01:37 AM)
Blissfully retired after 35 years treating sexual abuse


Moderator:  ModTeam, TJ jeff 

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