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#304339 - 09/26/09 10:56 PM Re: Why? We are seen as a scourge on society! [Re: steveb121]
reality2k4 Offline

Registered: 07/06/04
Posts: 6845
Loc: Stuck between water, air, and ...
The double edged sword will never leave us alone in our minds.
Nor of societal response to those who have been abused.
We have to strive to change that, but it still makes me weary of society response to those who have had to suffer,


Whoever stole the Sun, put it back and we'll drop all the charges!

#304421 - 09/27/09 09:53 PM Re: Why? We are seen as a scourge on society! [Re: reality2k4]
pufferfish Offline

Registered: 02/26/08
Posts: 6875
Loc: USA
I think that one of the problems has to do with sociopaths. I am going to review an excellent book on this soon in a different thread. It is The Sociopath Next Door.

Lots of our abusers were (are) sociopaths. They look like everybody else. They don't look like "monsters". Sociopaths are "untroubled" by having a conscience. They can abuse and manipulate without ever feeling bad about it. They are often excellent actors and can be very charming people. They are charming but they damage other people in terrible ways. They can often get by without being proscecuted. This book claims that 10% of the population is sociopathic. This is a startling fact.

Since they are very manipulative and self-seeking, they can worm their way into positions of leadership. Most of us don't have any idea how dangerous these people can be.

They are capable of passing laws which would protect themselves as abusers. Or, in other positions of leadership they would be quick to pass the blame back on to their victims.

Most people don't realize that these people are amongst us and how dangerous they can be.


pufferfish whistle

#304512 - 09/28/09 03:47 PM Re: Why? We are seen as a scourge on society! [Re: pufferfish]
J.R. Offline

Registered: 11/13/07
Posts: 312
Loc: United States
This is a very passionate topic for me.

For so long, I had the belief that I was going to be an abuser, no matter what. It was just destiny. In fact, it was reinforced by the ignorance of the media, and still is so much a part of society, and also all the group homes and hospitals had this idea I would just carry on into adulthood. I really think that is degrading and selling someone short. Giving a human being who deserves love, respect and a good perception on the future and what it has to offer, absolutely no chance because you have told him how it's going to be, and especially as a child, you will probably believe it.

This is one of the things I am really passionate about, and wish to devote my time and life work to, educating the public about the reality of abuse, in particular sexual abuse of boys and men, and how it affects them, and that it doesn't mean they turn into abusers themselves, and ways we can help them.

Lets keep this discussion going.


Character cannot be developed in ease and quiet. Only through experience of trial and suffering can the soul be strengthened, vision cleared, ambition inspired and success achieved. -Helen Keller

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