No porn, and the guilt/shame is gone. I feel like I can function without all the cloudy negative thoughts controlling my life. I am enjoying life and all it has to offer; I am not caught in the web of deception that porn brings with it.
I wish I could convey how good it feels to no longer be a slave to something, how good it feels knowing I don't have to spend endless hours in front of a computer screen to drown my anxiety. I no longer have to find that one mpeg or jpeg that will do it for me. I don't have to wish my family would just spend one more hour shopping so I can have more time with porn. I don't have to search for something crazier than the last session of porn, I don't have to hate myself for what I am doing.
I am not trying to sell you anything, I am not trying to tell you what to do. No one could have told me porn was destroying my life, only I could come to that conclusion. I just want to tell you how much better it feels.
Now that I am free from the strangle hold of porn I see what I had lost.
Love for life/family, my self.
Motivation to participate in normal every day activities.
Love of the simple things in life.
Respect for myself.
My ability to be around strangers, co-workers, family, (I thought "If they only knew what I looked at last night (porn) they would drop dead."
These things are coming back and it feels great. I had no idea porn was killing me, my mind, numbing my emotions and my relationship with my wife and children.
Sorry for the double porn post but my God it is so profound, it was ruling my life.
I hope you guys understand, I used for 30 years, I am not trying to tell you to stop, just saying what stopping has done for me.
Love you guys,