I get into this a LOT with slightly built men that have salt and pepper hair. The hair is the most prominent feature I can remember about my perp for some reason.
As for it going away or coping with it, I don't have any suggestions because I still can't, even after years of therapy and meds. But I thought I would add my voice here in a show of support.
"When we go into battle, I will be the first to set foot on the field, and I will be the last to step off, and I will leave no one behind. Dead, or alive, we will all come home together." LTG Hal Moore, Jr., USA (Ret.)