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#209796 - 03/10/08 12:51 AM Re: Positive Things [Re: dark empathy]
imbroken Offline

Registered: 02/20/08
Posts: 40
Loc: NJ
1. I went to church today willingly with my family. I looked at my daughter and wife and couldn't stop thinking how much I loved them. First time in a long time I went. I actually paid attention and listened to the priest. I felt really good, like he was talking to me.

2. I didn't blow up at my wife when she was venting at me. I controlled my anger, bit my tongue and actually thought about things for a minute. In the past, I would just erupt.

3. I worked on my car. I have an old mustang that I love to restore. Makes me feel good to take a piece from this tired, old car and bring back the shine. Most people throw away anything that is old or worn. It's so easy to just buy something new. But for some reason, I just feel good about myself working on it. When i have had bad thoughts over the years and felt really down, working on this car and reading about them has really gotten me through some tough times. It's been very good therapy for me.

4. Took my dog for a walk. Again, was nice to get out and do something productive.

5. Made dinner with my wife. For a couple minutes I forgot some of the problems we have had recently and realized I do love her very much. She will never know how sorry I am for putting her through this and how much I admire her for not kicking me out.

Despite a few minutes of being down, today was a really good day. I almost wish I could freeze time and replay today over and over. Ever see the movie Groundhog Day? I would be very happy if today was mine.

#209797 - 03/10/08 12:53 AM Re: Positive Things [Re: VLinvictus]
EGL Offline
Moderator Emeritus
Registered: 06/19/04
Posts: 7821
Church with my wife and daughters this morning.

Took my wife out for ice cream this afternoon.

Afterwards, we went to the park and walked around. It was a beautiful, 60+ degree day.

Visited with my in-laws for while (they live down the street from us). They are more like my parents than my blood parents are.

Spent time cooking dinner with my daughter this evening, talking about a lot of things.


#209799 - 03/10/08 12:59 AM Re: Positive Things [Re: VLinvictus]
hoverpup Offline
New Here

Registered: 03/10/08
Posts: 3
Loc: North Carolina
What a Wonderful Idea!!!

1. I spent some much needed one on one time with my eight year old son, playing gameboy(it was FUN)

2. Cooked dinner for my whole family on a moments notice(must not have been bad, nobody complained!!)

3. I took soaked in a tub(haven't done that in years)

4. Decided that once again I would try to tackle this problem instead of running away.

5. Found what I hope to be an awesome web site that will help me emensly!!

#209810 - 03/10/08 01:31 AM Re: Positive Things [Re: hoverpup]
Scoutvictim Offline

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri

Welcome to MS, I am glad you found this site, but I'm sorry you need it. MS is an awesome site, but the best thing about any site like this, is the guys who are involved.

I have to say you have seen some great comments on this thread, and I hope you can tell that these guys will always step up to help a fellow survivor. That is the best thing about this site, we support each other and stand by to offer a pat on the back or a shoulder to cry on.

I am so happy that you already feel comfortable enough to post on your first day on MS.

Plus, this thread you chose to post on is a great beginning, and you have given some fine examples of being positive. BRAVO!!! to you, for wanting to stop running and face this demon that we all are trying to defeat.

Welcome again,

P.S. #6 for me.... I wrote some encouraging words to a new member.

Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

#209816 - 03/10/08 01:51 AM Re: Positive Things [Re: rehpotsirhcs]
SuperTramp7981 Offline

Registered: 03/07/08
Posts: 99
Loc: Massachusetts
1.Finished 1984
2.Started Walden
3.walked with my dad down to a pub to watch soccer and eat lunch/drink a beer and paid for everything

Emancipate yourselves from mental slavery;
None but ourselves can free our minds.
Have no fear for atomic energy,
'Cause none of them can stop the time.
How long shall they kill our prophets,
While we stand aside and look? Ooh!
Some say it's just a part of it:
We've got to fulfil de book.

Chat Name-Lparsons

#209863 - 03/10/08 07:15 AM Re: Positive Things [Re: VLinvictus]
lucas Offline
New Here

Registered: 03/10/08
Posts: 4
Loc: scottsdale, arizona
i just now found this site, and am so relieved. do you know how hard it is to find support groups? or therapists specializing in male abuse? anyway ill put down my positive things for the day.
1.i saw a friend in the hospital, and talked to her
2.i sat out in the sun! it was 80 degrees today! started chipping away at the winter whiteness
3.made my own dinner. a rarity for me
4.i did my laundry
5.set up a lunch date for wednesday!

didnt realize how hard that would be. today was a depressing day but now that im thinking of the positives its great! im glad i found this site

#209929 - 03/10/08 09:23 PM Re: Positive Things [Re: lucas]
rehpotsirhcs Offline

Registered: 10/11/07
Posts: 204
I'm so glad everyone liked my post idea!

1. I started a really cool thread (15 responses so far!) and even got 2 new people involved!

2. Had a good conversation on the phone (I even talked!) with a friend

3. A girl gave me her cell phone number today \:D

4. I turned in homework today at school

5. I did not skip any classes today even though I really wanted to

#209934 - 03/10/08 09:47 PM Re: Positive Things [Re: rehpotsirhcs]
GateKPR4 Offline

Registered: 10/29/07
Posts: 955
Loc: North Carolina, USA
1. I posted to this thread
2. I went to my dr. today to get some help because the I feel like crap.
3. I went to work and had a pretty good day
4. I had a girl flirt with me at work....???? whats up with that?
I must be getting better with gotta be those 6pk abs with padding that got her... \:D
5. I talked to my mom some more about male abuse
7. I posted something positive and supportive in another thread
8. I laughed at myself today \:D

I'm a normal person dealing with abnormal experiences.
The greatest discoveries we will find within ourselves.
|| || || || || || |

#209938 - 03/10/08 10:35 PM Re: Positive Things [Re: GateKPR4]
dark empathy Offline

Registered: 11/26/07
Posts: 2669
Loc: durham, north england
1: I woke up at half past three this morning, but spent four hours reading the screwtape letters which helped, not feeling dysmal.

2: I actually got some ideas for my thesis out of my head and written down.

3: I went to see my therapist today and had a reasonable conversation, about my self worth issues, and feel better for that.

4: I gave my kitchin a complete and utter hard core cleaning so that it no longer resembles a war zone.

5: Though I got an E-mail from my superviser seriously wondering where my work is going, I only panicked briefly, shared the problem with my family, which culmninated in my mum agreeing to speak to my supervioser tomorrow on my behalf, tell him that I'm finally trying to deal with my abuse, and suggest I do my phd part time.

6: I accepted this help from my family without feeling either like a parasite, or that my independence was being stamped on.

#209950 - 03/10/08 11:58 PM Re: Positive Things [Re: dark empathy]
Patrick Walsh Offline

Registered: 01/08/08
Posts: 22
Loc: PA
five things
I did not blow up at an associate when he seemed to take forever to tackle a problem. And lo and behold, when we got the time it only took 15 mintues to solve (i usually would have blown up)
I had sex with my wife in the morning, even though I was late and felt guilty for coming into work late. It made her feel special.
I got a project started that I've been stressing about, and of course, once I got started, it seemed a lot easier.
I said 5 supportive things to coworkers. Even though I didn't really want to.


I'm a good person. I'm a good man. I'm a postive force and I will not be shamed.

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