again i wrote a long post (couple of pages), but i don't like to post those
anyway, summarising some bits of it
i didn't realise my brother was coming home today, he was being his usual self, so within a scenario, he comes to me and is putting his arm around me (faking caring-because he knows i dont like things like that- especially from him), but trying to crush me with his arm, and in his job he suppose to be pretty strong but I think my strength matches his because you can tell when your wrestling in that kind of way.
It came out without it meaning to, my choice of words, i said, with an intensity that i didn't realise i had and calm and control and maybe too much purpose, it certainly took me back, i said "Dont touch me, Dont touch me"
My father gave me a curious look, if my brother noticed my words, he didn't show it. I also implied that he was gay.
I must have been posessed because i didn't plan to use those words, it must have wanted to come out. My father later expressed an interest in reading a story (fiction) that i've been writing for ages and before he wasn't interested in it, when i joked that it wouldn't be finished for another twenty years he said that he could be dead within five years, what kind of thing is that to say? and why the interest now?
anyway, take that! DONT TOUCH ME! i wish i had said it back then, grrrrrrrrr!
DONT TOUCH ME!