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#195090 - 12/13/07 05:54 PM Brothers
kellygtx Offline

Registered: 07/11/07
Posts: 412
Loc: Texas, USA
There were three of us boys
- brothers
Kerry was 4 years my senior
and Donnie was 6 years
more than that
leaving me the youngest

Donnie took his own life
I was 12 and he was 22
- I never understood
- I donít think I ever asked why

Kerry was my molester
it started when I was 10
and ended
- abruptly
when Donnie
snuffed out his own life
two long years later

Kerry died in 1992 -
AIDS drained his life
he took our secret to his grave
and I never told

Mother found her comfort
in rum and coke
I canít say she ever mistreated me
but she was absent to my pain

Dad worked to provide
and never saw the signs
or I prefer to think
he never saw the signs

and I did the best I could
to cope with the impossible
so why do I feel
I am the ONLY ONE
Who let me down

Edited by kellygtx (12/13/07 08:59 PM)
I bid you Peace.


The time is always NOW. Breath In. Breath Out. Move On.

#195101 - 12/13/07 07:51 PM Re: Brothers [Re: kellygtx]
AndyJB2005 Offline

Registered: 11/14/06
Posts: 1249
Loc: Minnesota
Thank you so much for this, Kelly. It is so powerful. I'm glad you could find us here. \:\)

Life's disappointments are harder to take when you don't know any swear words. -- Calvin (Calvin and Hobbes)

#195157 - 12/14/07 01:45 AM Re: Brothers [Re: AndyJB2005]
michael Joseph Offline

Registered: 03/11/01
Posts: 2719
Loc: Virginia
have a great day

you said a lot

you went through a lot

so did I

nice to have you here

wish you did not need to be here

wish I did not have to too

Standing together is so much better than hiding in the dark.
***I am a three time WoR Retreat Alumni***
The Round Table, Men's CSA Group, Monday 7:30pm CST, MaleSurvivor Chat

#195340 - 12/15/07 01:41 PM Re: Brothers [Re: kellygtx]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA

Originally Posted By: kellygtx
and I did the best I could
to cope with the impossible
so why do I feel
I am the ONLY ONE
Who let me down

There are many reasons why an abused boy will see fault in himself rather than in those who let him down. But I guess the most important thing to recognize now, as an adult, is the fact of your innocence. We often read here how it can't be the child's fault, and that's a truth that we need not only to know, but also to believe in. That truth can be one of the most powerful tools we will ever have.

Much love,

Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)


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