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#164788 - 07/04/07 11:57 PM overcoming sexual numbness
Michael17 Offline
New Here

Registered: 07/04/07
Posts: 2
Hello. I am 43 and have been sexually numb (The problem is only a lack of sensation.) for almost 30 years, having had a few years of full feeling prior. I would like to hear from anyone who has overcome this or from anyone who has any knowledge of relevent resources. Thank you.

#164831 - 07/05/07 04:17 AM Re: overcoming sexual numbness [Re: Michael17]
Scoutvictim Offline

Registered: 06/04/07
Posts: 434
Loc: St. Louis, Missouri

Let me start off by saying welcome, but sorry you have to come here.

I do wish I had the answer but I struggle with the same problem. One thing that I do is focus on my partner, as long as he has a good experience, then I usually enjoy myself. My sensation problem seems to only occur when I'm with a another person.

You don't say if this occurs during masterbation. For me it doesn't, which leads me to believe it's all in my head. I know I have to work through it mentally, but I think it comes from a lack of trust. When I find "Mr. Right", I do believe it will be a little easier to solve.

I know I've given you a round about answer, but it may help you to know it's something others feel.

If you have any other questions, don't hesitate to ask them here or if you would rather, PM me and I'll answer anything.

I know it's hard to talk about somethings in an open forum, but I promise no one here will be shocked or betray your confidence.

Hope to here from you soon,

Shawn and Ben will always be in my heart....

Happiness is like peeing your pants; Everyone can see it, but only YOU feel the warmth.

Peebles, Ohio WOR alumni, Oct. 2007

#164907 - 07/05/07 05:26 PM Re: overcoming sexual numbness [Re: Scoutvictim]
peacefulhealing Offline
Junior Member

Registered: 09/20/04
Posts: 9
Hello Michael,

I've not had the feeling of numbness before, but my ex-boyfriend had when we first started dating. It seemed to be linked to trust for him, as well as "sex is bad" syndrone. In any case it was a cue for him to look at his views, about sex and about sexuality and how it fits into his life, how it benefits his life, and what are the things that upsets him about sex and sexuality. We have since broken up after almost two years together, and he his delving deeper into inquiry in his consciousness, asking himself those important questions, and feeling from the heart, where he'd like to be.

Thanks so much for your post.

#185647 - 10/08/07 03:57 PM Re: overcoming sexual numbness [Re: peacefulhealing]
HellNY Offline
New Here

Registered: 10/05/07
Posts: 1

I have like 75% sexual numbness. It started suddenly 2 1/2 years ago. I struggle to get it better. The only way I overcome it is when my partner really "turns me on." But it takes a lot to get there. It feels like part of my soul was removed.

#185655 - 10/08/07 04:21 PM Re: overcoming sexual numbness [Re: HellNY]
pain4ever Offline

Registered: 04/05/01
Posts: 1032

I spent years not being able to feel a thing sexually wise. Normally I just disassociated out of sex. However after I got out of the hospital and met my partner...who i love very much....I started to have feeling down there. Its not always there but its a 50\50 thing. It so tied to our abuse and your emotional state...until that gets better the numbness wont start receeding.

ALSO...if you have aset back in your recovery it may come back! Thats just my experience.


Peace and Tranquility all depends on your frame of reference.

#190685 - 11/10/07 04:33 AM Re: overcoming sexual numbness [Re: pain4ever]
Daniel72 Offline
New Here

Registered: 11/10/07
Posts: 2
Loc: Texas, USA
I just don't feel like I get any enjoyment out of sex. When I was in my 20's it was just okay. Now, I am 34 and I get no enjoyment at all really. Some people say that I just haven't found the right guy yet.


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