Today is christmas and I feel so alone, I woke up at 330 am and treked to church. I feel alone and that is not worth the effort today. I want to go hide but I'm at work. I've promised my sponser to go to this men's meeting but I'm tired if playing that ambiguous sexuality. I'm truly sick and tired of all this recovery crap AA ACOA AMAC two therapist and a pyschiatrist. I can't even cry anymore, and I know its me I'm surrounded by pretty good people flawed but good, but can't get any rest, I'm always emotionally tired.
I've given up a lot of unhealthy behavior, but I am waiting for the good stuff.
So I press on, tommorow is my first day at tje gym maybe that will help.
you're not alone