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#173485 - 08/15/07 08:51 PM The day the life I knew ended
BruisedSpirit Offline

Registered: 06/26/07
Posts: 192
Loc: Ontario, Canada
The man I used to be is no longer. Left in his place is someone I don't recognize. I wonder which one of them is real...I don't know anymore. I used to think I was just a "regular" guy, living a "normal" life. The way I lived seemed normal to me. Then one day everything changed. I started to remember. Nightmares. Fear. Shame. Self hatred. Uncertainty.

The life I knew is now over. This scares the hell out of me.

Edited by BruisedSpirit (08/15/07 08:53 PM)

#173487 - 08/15/07 09:01 PM Re: The day the life I knew ended [Re: BruisedSpirit]
Dewey2k Offline

Registered: 08/22/05
Posts: 3069
You aren't alone, and you're in the right place.

Hang in there, brother.

#173492 - 08/15/07 09:30 PM Re: The day the life I knew ended [Re: BruisedSpirit]
thecoopstah Offline

Registered: 07/19/04
Posts: 589
Loc: massachusetts
I felt just like you're feeling when "life as i knew it would never be the same"(although i quote myself of course..

I'm in recovery from alcoholism since 2002 and i was about 2 yrs sober when all the toxins and misery re-surfaced and i thought i was going insane.

This is not something we go through by oursleves,we need lots of love and support and i can guarentee you,you will find that here.Male survivor can/will give you a perspective you would otherwise not have if you,fo whatever reason,did not find abd use this forum.

I'm not a man with any any words of wisdom however i can tell you that you're not abnormal,nor are you different, you're a man who had someone inflictupon you their power and took away your innocence.

Keep sharing how YOU feel and things/life/moments/situations/circumstances will become easier although not overnight.

You're going to be alright,stay true to yourself and keep using your voice because YOU MATTER and dont allow anyone to tell you otherwise.Stay close to male survivor and you will get through virtually anything.We can all do this together.


Edited by thecoopstah (08/15/07 09:32 PM)
" You never know how strong you are until being strong is the only choice you have "

#173496 - 08/15/07 09:49 PM Re: The day the life I knew ended [Re: thecoopstah]
endlessjourney Offline

Registered: 11/01/05
Posts: 518
Loc: Cincinnati Ohio
Everything feels so different now. When the truth comes out, it's a lot to deal with. I've learned that it is wise to take your recovery slowly. It helps to take the pain in bits and pieces, and when we feel overwhelmed, it's good to just get away from it for a bit and take a breather. Its not healthy to rush your recovery. As Coopstah said, this doesn't happen over night.
You can tell us your feelings here. That is crucial when addressing CSA issues. It's important to make sure you're ready and you feel safe expressing your feelings first. However, you'll find that you are safe hear. Stay strong. You'll be happy again.


Edited by endlessjourney (08/15/07 09:50 PM)
Truth is the very reason we strive to live. It surrounds and resides within us. Accepting the truths we already know and seeking out those we do not is a direct path to inner balance and joy. For life is not a means to an end, but a journey. Life comes and goes but the truth will always live on.

#173499 - 08/15/07 10:08 PM Re: The day the life I knew ended [Re: endlessjourney]
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA

You feel this way because you are working on issues and problems you aren't accustomed to facing, I think. There are so many challenges and obstacles, and it's just plain hard looking back at everything that has happened to us.

I wonder if it will help you to know that the "regular" guy living a "normal" life was in fact covering up a huge problem. This was going to come out sooner or later - it always does. You're facing something that's been with you a long time, and dealing with it can only be good for you. That may not feel like it's true right now, but things to get a LOT better.

Much love,

Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)


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