Hey, Mark --
Thanks for your thoughts...
maybe the code word isn't just 'sex' - if people are mistaking you for lovers - than a. your way to emotionally connected to each other to be just friends emotionally. you know what i mean?
I think so. We sort of got used to being "fixtures" in each others' lives. Like a place-holder where a lover would be. I don't know why the chemistry for being lovers isn't there for me, except that even as friends, I find myself holding him back--defending my space and free time. It can be pretty triggering.
you say you don't want it - but could you be willing to open up to his maybe just 'holding your hand' while you go for a walk.
I guess I've always been afraid that I'd be creating more expectations and setting him up to get hurt if I let us blur the line between friends and lovers. I've always been the one maintaining the boundaries.
and maybe find a girlfriend - if you feel that strongly about it
I don't think that'll be happening anytime soon!
maybe a revisting of boundaries or a look at your pattern together and really think - What do you want here? where are you going with this
I hope that's what we've started. I really hope we can keep the friendship we have, but be free to find what we need in our lives.