Newest Members
bushydw, Teddyboy1969, Ransuko, Lovme4me, MRSAS
13556 Registered Users
Today's Birthdays
Cherub (45), Wolf71 (46)
Who's Online
5 registered (Rich1967, brad1928, UniversalBeing, 2 invisible), 57 Guests and 4 Spiders online.
Key: Admin, Global Mod, Mod
Forum Stats
13,556 Registered Members
75 Forums
70,506 Topics
492,375 Posts

Most users ever online: 418 @ 07/02/12 11:29 AM
Topic Options
#149925 - 04/10/07 12:30 AM muh
jamie' Offline

Registered: 03/10/07
Posts: 125
Loc: Ont, Can
I just got hom from the hospital. Had an argument with my father. He misinterpreted my tone of voice for talking back. And cracked me one, needed four stiches on my inner cheek. I dont care, i'm an adult and i choose not to do anything. But this sprung out in my head. Took me five minutes to think up and write and i'm intoxicated now so it might show. Oddly enough it started out with my father and turned into something directed at my uncle....i cant explain why.

I'm not gonna cry, not gonna cry, i'm not gonna cry, i'm not. i'm gonna rip out my fucking axe. And desroy this place. 40 pound sludgehammer in the side of your face. I'm gonna rip you fucking head off. snap your mother fucking head off. Set the bitch on fire supress my homicidal desires to, huh. you 300 hundred pound lazy eye'd meneces, i'll unload 16 shots and all i got out my glock. punch you out the frame. I'm fucking insane and i'll plead my insanity case to you. just for you.i'll pour out to you. but i need to warn you that this vaulnerablility feeling leaves me a sociatal risk. watch for the eye twitch, the mind glich. the buck knife shift, stab until i'm drained.left in a bloody haze. yeah whats come over me, how'd i'd get to this place. Oh yeah...i'm insane. at this life stage with this lifes rage rising up out my vains. Cant be contained, boxed or restrained. Excuse me bill...i wanna have a talk with you. I'm fucking sick and my sickness wants a word with you. Its his shift now and he's got a beef with you. he aches and pleads for you. Needs to comunicate to you. with razor blade lips for you. He's sick...his medicine is baseball bat swings at you. daydreams of fire flames flick at you. And i hope i follow you. In your dreams i hope i haunt you.

Dont even know if thats an ending. But it'll do for now.

No matter how long and dark the night is, Or the fear and hurt that it can bring, there will always be a dawn, where we can push the past aside and move forward with hope.

#149932 - 04/10/07 01:03 AM Re: muh [Re: jamie']
roadrunner Offline
Administrator Emeritus

Registered: 05/02/05
Posts: 22045
Loc: Carlisle, PA

That's powerful stuff and I'm glad you are letting the anger out. When we keep it suppressed inside we just set ourselves up for it to explode some other time.

Much love,

Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking my freedom highway.
Nobody living can make me turn back:
This land was made for you and me.
(Woody Guthrie)


Moderator:  ModTeam 

I agree that my access and use of the MaleSurvivor discussion forums and chat room is subject to the terms of this Agreement. AND the sole discretion of MaleSurvivor.
I agree that my use of MaleSurvivor resources are AT-WILL, and that my posting privileges may be terminated at any time, and for any reason by MaleSurvivor.