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#131660 - 11/30/04 03:13 AM Who am I, REALLY?
MikeInFlorida Offline

Registered: 11/27/04
Posts: 43
Loc: Titusville
My name is Mike, and I am 42 years old. I served our country in the U.S. Air Force from 1982 - 1986. My father was a marine, and so was my brother.

I was sexually abused by my step father from the time I was 10 years old until I was 16. My mom divorced my biological dad when I was just 7 years old due to his chronic drinking problem.

When I was in High School (In Tallahassee / South Georgia) I chose to befriend a group of guys who were homophobic. We would drive by the local gay bar, and throw our empty beer bottles at the guys outside the bar, calling them names like "Fag", "Cock Sucker" I think that you get the picture. Luckily I never hit anyone with an empty bottle. I WAS homophobic. I remained homophobic for several more years, then when I was active duty stationed over in Germany I had a sexual experience with a black guy who was in the Army. His name was Leroy, and he, and I proceeded to have sex several more times. I have been with more guys than gals, and have only been in one long-term relationship, and that was with a guy.

To this day part of me STILL does NOT want to be gay, while another part of me loving, accepts and em brasses my being gay.

IF anyone is willing to be my friend, and advise me on how to proceed with coming to terms with who I honestly am ( A gay male). Your care will be GREATLY appreciated.

I am seeing a psychologist once a month, but I really need to make a couple of friends that I can find support in and chat with from time to time. I currently don't have any friends, I don't share this information out of, nor am I looking for any pity, but just to say that I need a friend, really.


Mike in Florida

You can contact me at

Love others, as you love yourself.

#131661 - 11/30/04 08:12 AM Re: Who am I, REALLY?
Mike Church Offline
Moderator Emeritus
Registered: 01/23/03
Posts: 3439
Loc: Toronto, Canada
MIke we are all in this together believe me, gay straight or in between. Coming to grips with your own identity is so important to us. And it does not matter what you are. More importantly it is who you are and your values and beliefs.

You got a friend here Mike.

A canuck.



#131662 - 11/30/04 09:23 AM Re: Who am I, REALLY?
lostcowboy Offline

Registered: 11/10/04
Posts: 798
Loc: Rhode Island
Hi Mike, First I recommend editing your posts and removing your email address. These messages can be read by anyone on the web, and you could get a lot of hate mail! Once you know someone well. Then you can send them a private message with your email.

About (IF anyone is willing to be my friend, and advise me on how to proceed with coming to terms with who I honestly am ( A gay male). Your care will be GREATLY appreciated.)

Try not to push this, people are willing to be your friend, but it has to happen at its own speed. Just relax about it. As you post messages around the site you will have people respond.

You may want the monitor to move this post to the gay survivors forum, I think it belongs more there than here.

"Don't walk in front of me, I may not follow. Don't walk behind me, I may not lead. Just walk beside me and be my friend." - Albert Camus
Pretty much my life as I have posted so far. Triggers!

#131663 - 12/02/04 08:38 PM Re: Who am I, REALLY?
abcd Offline

Registered: 10/20/00
Posts: 189
Loc: GA
I dunno if this well help you, but check out this site and click on Florida. You may find what you need...


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