I think you need to think long and hard on what you truly are wanting. Because based on your subject line, I would have to say 'why?' Do you truly and honestly want to go back to how you were? I don't think so. But maybe I don't know you as well as I like to think I do. Surviving is one thing. Healing is about progress, moving forward, not wishing to go back.
Avatar photo in memory of my younger brother Makar.
"Human salvation lies in the hands of the creatively maladjusted."~~~Martin Luther King Jr., 1963