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Forum   Subject
Introductions
Jump to new posts HI I think it is time to introduce myself by Esterio @ 10/15/17 11:30 PM

Hi my name I am using here is Esterio, I am 62 years old. I have been coming here for months now. I believe I have found a place where I can come and talk to my peers about what happened. I don't really feel like getting into a long history of me
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Being Naked - Trigger Warning! by Eternal18 @ 10/15/17 11:22 PM

Wow guys so I'm not crazy. I feared nudity and sex so badly. I still do. Sort of got over the the fear of nudity in a self destructive way. Erotic messages. Not a good idea 2 our of 10 were nice. The risk is not worth it. I have to get my hep b tes
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Behaving around children by Eternal18 @ 10/15/17 11:01 PM

Thank you Will. I needed reminding of that
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: 15 different reasons men have sex with men by iaccus @ 10/15/17 09:19 PM

Thank you for the post, certainly food for thought!
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: 15 different reasons men have sex with men by iaccus @ 10/15/17 09:19 PM

Thank you for the post, certainly food for thought!
Off Topic
Jump to new posts Re: i dont love you. by Sterling @ 10/15/17 08:28 PM

dkjfal;sdffdsafdsf dkd dkld ei d I feel bad. a;sdkfjklf thanks guys. I met a wonderful woman at a bar last night. Natalia. she is pretty. but her affectionate personality , very charming. She took a liking to me. I told her I was gay. we wer
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Is ok to cry?? by genedebs @ 10/15/17 08:26 PM

Dear NOBODYCT, I think Suwanee has it right. My suppression of crying is my father's had curled in a fist. "If you don't stop crying, I will give you something to cry about" I cried for over a week solid, even had trouble walking straig
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: want to write this down by genedebs @ 10/15/17 08:06 PM

To Iaccus I wish I did not understand. To become lost within my mind moving from one fractured thought to another, is frustrating and promotes for me that sense of isolation and disconnection (anomy). It makes me more vulnerable to flashbacks. Wh
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: 15 different reasons men have sex with men by SmartShadow @ 10/15/17 06:07 PM

Hey Ed, Thanks for your thoughts and input. Yeah I think we live in very interesting times. I completely agree with needing to talk about it. I strongly believe that the gay rights movement was one of the most important social revolutions of my lif
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: 15 different reasons men have sex with men by EdfromNYC @ 10/15/17 04:50 PM

I appreciate what you are bringing here in these threads. It's incredibly valuable and thankfully there is a subforum on this site. The fact that there is this subforum means - to me - that we men should be able to discuss this issue without fear of
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Visiting your Inner Child by Chris4TheMill @ 10/15/17 04:28 PM

Very long story short, I never went looking for any 'inner child" because I considered that concept to be a New Age-y / John Bradshaw-ish kind of baloney. But then, years into my recovery work, there he was. He appeared on his own. Meaning, a
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Behaving around children by Suwanee @ 10/15/17 04:22 PM

Originally Posted By Eternal18 But when I read in a book when I was 15 that abused become abusers my world crumbled and I feared for the worst obsessively from that moment forth. It caused me so much sadness and pain and anxiety and fear. I swear had
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Behaving around children by Chris4TheMill @ 10/15/17 04:13 PM

I wish I had a good answer, but have the same problem. I enjoy interacting with young children because everything is new and a joy to them. It's refreshing. But I am paranoid about even looking at them now because parents have a tendency to paint
Survivors of Female Abuse
Jump to new posts Re: Abused by Gran then my self for life TRIGGER by Eternal18 @ 10/15/17 01:46 PM

I don't know. I've worked out that there are stats for abuse like 1/3 females and 1/6 males. But then you need to look at the duration, severity, and impact. I'd much rather some pig groped me for a minute than I was in such a sick pathological r
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Behaving around children by Eternal18 @ 10/15/17 01:23 PM

I have never acted out in 26 years since my abuse. But when I read in a book when I was 15 that abused become abusers my world crumbled and I feared for the worst obsessively from that moment forth. It caused me so much sadness and pain and anxiety a
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Being Naked - Trigger Warning! by dark empathy @ 10/15/17 12:59 PM

@Chris, I'm sorry your not there yet, believe me I know how painful sitting around and waiting for the right person to turn up can be. I also have absolutely no tips at all, I had never even kissed someone before august of 2015 when I was 33, and my
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Visiting your Inner Child by Ceremony @ 10/15/17 12:57 PM

Hi LWx and Ttl, I've begun that process a little while ago, and it's not something I've found easy to do on my own. I've added an outside nurturer, a safe person of my choosing. I wrote about it in EMDR, dissociation and me It's something I disco
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Visiting your Inner Child by traveler @ 10/15/17 12:48 PM

i couldn't get it to "work" when i tried to converse with my younger self. it felt phony - like i was just making things up. but when i tried writing him a letter - what i would have told him from my adult perspective after what i've learne
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Behaving around children by LoneWolfX @ 10/15/17 11:41 AM

Ever since my "acting out" when I was 16 (19 years ago) I have become very uncomfortable around children. Before this I used to be very good with children, especially having a half-brother 12 years younger than me. Please note that it has
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: want to write this down by manipulated @ 10/15/17 11:11 AM

Write, say, vent we care. You are both important to this community, to me.
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: I'm grieving the loss of a transgender teen by LoneWolfX @ 10/15/17 10:34 AM

Why does someone dislike another person for no reason? I don't dislike anyone unless they do something to hurt me or their morals are bad. For example, If someone is annoying I won't dislike them or be mean - I will just find them annoying! An excep
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Visiting your Inner Child by Tryingtolive @ 10/15/17 10:21 AM

Ive tried doing this but I don’t remember my child self that much. I was a happy kid. A quiet kid. Curious. Friendly. Shy. Also was kind of a bully. I wasn’t the brightest kid either. Head in the clouds. Always a dreamer. Still very well am
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Visiting your Inner Child by LoneWolfX @ 10/15/17 10:13 AM

Hi again, My therapist encourages me to visit my "inner child" - meditate to communicate with the little boy in me. I did this once. He was friendly and said that e thought it was his fault that his parents got divorced. (I was 5 when my
Family and Friends
Jump to new posts Re: New to the forum / pushing and pulling by HealingHope @ 10/15/17 08:05 AM

Hi Golden Phoenix I can hear your confusion, love and how much you so want your survivor’s safety. I also hear how you’re hurting too. The abuse effects are far reaching and the way I’ve translated my survivor’s push pull is “ I need you,
Survivors of Female Abuse
Jump to new posts Re: Are ALL women this awful? Or is it just me? by Chris4TheMill @ 10/15/17 06:04 AM

Guys, I gave up hope for many years too. It is just recently that I am trying again. I feel stronger now to face the issues and the rejection. And yes, I am getting ghosted and rejected too. A lot of women are not going to give me the time o
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