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Forum   Subject
Survivors of Female Abuse
Jump to new posts Re: How the MeToo Trend Made Me Feel Lonely by SubtleStuff @ 11/18/17 08:31 PM

Hi Blue, I've been pondering this post. Anything to do with power dynamics intrigues and challenges me to see how it works more clearly. It also helps me understand how the many abuses of power I endured in my youth (and how I've internalized them t
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Trans/Gender issues by SmartShadow @ 11/18/17 08:13 PM

Originally Posted By SDD757I have been diagnosed with dissociative identity disorder. Well there you go. That's very interesting that we both developed a female personality from early trauma. It seems the violence in my case and the sexual abuse i
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Trans/Gender issues by SDD757 @ 11/18/17 06:38 PM

Quote:Out of curiosity I Googled "gender dysphoria and dissociative identity disorder" not trying to over lay this on anyone else but this lines up well with my situation rather well. I have been diagnosed with dissociative identity disord
Male Survivors
I agree with Seachange. You're not the only person thinking that, DavoSwim. I don't in any way defend what Spacey and these other abusers did. But seeing some of these stories reminds me just how bad I had it. I like seeing people come forward, but I
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Trans/Gender issues by SmartShadow @ 11/18/17 04:41 PM

Originally Posted By SDD757It my abuse started at 4 years old and went on until about 7. That's a long time. I can't imagine what that must have been like for you. I am really sorry you went through all of that. My early abuse was mostly physical a
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Trans/Gender issues by SmartShadow @ 11/18/17 03:47 PM

Out of curiosity I Googled "gender dysphoria and dissociative identity disorder" not trying to over lay this on anyone else but this lines up well with my situation rather well. In my case I think my gender dysphoria stems from my dissocia
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Hard Morning by Ceremony @ 11/18/17 11:00 AM

Hi Jim and Bri, I have a lot of work to do so I'll love myself, or maybe more importantly feel the love others say to me. I'm not sure if that book lays it out like Janina Fisher, the way one lost the chance to attach, because parents neglected the
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: gender identity confusion by Ceremony @ 11/18/17 10:32 AM

Hi Shawni J. It's awesome to hear you're in a relationship that's comforting, with a partner attune to you, and you saying you are also. That's a place of security for sure, one I'm sure helps to do any work needed with your issues. This one that y
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Hard Morning by BDD @ 11/18/17 09:57 AM

Jim, Thank you. I looked at her website. The phase that struck me was "...parents who inadvertently emotionally neglect their children". I never bonded with my father, I felt like I repulsed him. Wow how can you live with feelings for yo
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: gender identity confusion by AOAN72 @ 11/18/17 09:33 AM

S.J. I am not an expert, but I wanted to let you know that I too have more comfort socializing with women especially when my wife is there. I don't have to worry about being "the guy" I can laugh and joke and enjoy their company. I have a
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Hard Morning by AOAN72 @ 11/18/17 09:04 AM

BDD, thanks for posting, I have always felt that same sense of "disconnection" from other guys. I have started sensing a "sense of community" here on MS. You can post your ideas and the other guys will give their support. Betwe
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Harry @ 11/18/17 08:31 AM

Yes, because the sh*t was f*ckin up, but since my perp was a minor, I can think of that sh*t as "stupid sh*t" instead of "evil sh*t". But only barely. Sh*t's sh*t, anyway you sh*t it. Pardon my language.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Do you ever wonder "if I were loved"? by Harry @ 11/18/17 08:17 AM

I wonder too. What if I had had it better. Hypothetically, if I was nurtured perfectly, I could save the world. Right? Hypothetical potential is astoundingly boundless.
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts gender identity confusion by Shawni J. @ 11/18/17 06:14 AM

I have been doing good for a long time now in slowly working though my issues with my CSA and have actually stopped therapy because of learning good coping skill but lately a new problem has been starting to bother me. I guess it has been present all
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Do you ever wonder "if I were loved"? by usmc97 @ 11/18/17 04:29 AM

I honestly believe I would've been nearly unstoppable. I have talents, but I get so self conscious. I have intelligence, but I'm so doubtful. I'm friendly, but so scared. I'm loving, but have few to love. And so on, and so on... There's a lot, but
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Chase Eric @ 11/17/17 11:02 PM

I was twelve and he was fifteen. Even though I was three years younger than him and hadn't hit puberty yet, I knew it was wrong. So then he should have known it as well. Also, I could never have imagined doing what he did to anyone else when I did
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Is how I feel normal? by seachange @ 11/17/17 10:28 PM

Thank you Traveler and Ceremony. It's my new normal, FallGuy. Strong feelings, perpetual fog, crying, poor concentration at work, anxiety, affirmative on all of the above. Other things too. I am using a journal to write about it. I too just started t
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by SDD757 @ 11/17/17 10:14 PM

My stepdad and then teen step brother. No, it changes nothing about how I feel about it.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Is how I feel normal? by traveler @ 11/17/17 09:35 PM

Absolutely normal reaction to an abnormal situation. i remember feeling by turns dazed/numb and a chaotic mix of unidentifiable emotions that left me disoriented and confused. it will pass in time, but don't be surprised if these and other reaction
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by traveler @ 11/17/17 09:26 PM

i was abused by a step-dad, a gang of teen bullies, and an adult stranger. i do not feel the age of the teens is any mitigating factor. what they did to me was sustained over a period of two years and was intentionally cruel and cowardly. even if sex
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Ceremony @ 11/17/17 08:51 PM

The two, at different points of time, Who molested me, were teens. I am frustrated their actions interrupted my idea of myself. It's not okay they sexualized me when I was clueless. My work and thoughts are still in progress, and I'm very interested
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts If your perp was a teen.... by AlexBoyd @ 11/17/17 08:48 PM

Does his age at the time of the abuse affect how you think about him now?
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Is how I feel normal? by Ceremony @ 11/17/17 08:38 PM

I feel like apologizing to say they're common for us. Let me add, we become better managers of our emotions and lives with working on what we need, therapy and time.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Is how I feel normal? by FallGuy2154 @ 11/17/17 08:34 PM

So last week I admitted to my Therapist that I was abused. Since then lots of feelings have been coming back. I feel as if I am walking around in a fog. I can concentrate on work, but it is hard. I have been pretty anxious especially in the mornin
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