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Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Its Taken Too Long by sorryson @ 08/25/16 06:01 PM

Zookeeper your letter was heartfelt for me. You have accepted yourself and the boy who was hurt. You are protecting him now. I hope it hope it helps you to feel as one. Thank you for sharing it with us. Paul
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Dreams How They Change by sorryson @ 08/25/16 05:56 PM

Kevin I am happy to hear. Sleep is so important and it sounds like your doctor thinks you have done a lot of processing. Glad for you. Paul
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: T says that I don't recognize myself as a victim by Nothing Man @ 08/25/16 02:21 PM

Hi Logan. It is indeed a difficult question and I am glad you are talking about it. The more we talk and process this information the less frightening it becomes. Please remember that nobody is allowing you to speak your mind here on these boards
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Dreams How They Change by Nothing Man @ 08/25/16 02:15 PM

Hi Kevin It is great news that you are no longer afraid to sleep and that your rest has been populated with happy dreams. That is a really good sign for you. I think your therapist is right that it means you are starting to process some of the abu
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Dreams How They Change by KMCINVA @ 08/25/16 10:48 AM

Lately I have been dreaming and find myself waking up laughing. My friend was here recently and she said it was nice to hear me laughing in my sleep instead of trembling and screaming with fear. I now remember some of these pleasant dreams, silly t
Jump to new posts Re: my intro to healing by Older1 @ 08/25/16 10:34 AM

Hi Mike; Welcome back to M-S. You appear to be building a good base for your life ahead. You found this site perhaps by accident, perhaps by searching for answers concerning childhood sexual issues. It dos not matter why or how you found this site,
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: T says that I don't recognize myself as a victim by unhappycamper @ 08/25/16 10:24 AM

Logan (& other guys): I don't have a problem with saying I was a "victim." All that means is that I was on the receiving end of a couple of crimes against the person. IMHO (and IMHX), "victim" is just a(n) historical fact, no
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts potentially useful metaphor by DannyT @ 08/25/16 09:54 AM

Hi Guys, I've been reading a book by Thich Nhat Hanh on understanding our mind. The first verse says, "mind is a field in which every kind of seed is sown. This mind-field can also be called "all the seeds." The commentary says: &q
Male Survivors
Logan - Yes, its a difficult topic. I do see myself as having been a victim - because as it was explained above, the individual has had something done to them that was a violation of some sort and they had no control over the situation. My T also has
Male Survivors
Thank you all very much for replying to this very difficult topic. I Find it difficult because just the word "Victim," can have and hold many different meanings and complications from those meanings! One such complication that I think I h
Off Topic
Jump to new posts Re: i love you by 30something @ 08/24/16 11:35 PM

(((Sterling))) (((BFree))) I'm behind you. Asa
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: ad misleads to imply trans people abuse kids by 30something @ 08/24/16 11:34 PM

Horrified and sick of this "trans people are molesters" BS. Scapegoating a vulnerable group (trans ppl) using another vulnerable group (children) as a smokescreen. Thanks for sharing, Jacob. I hadn't yet seen this. Asa
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Would I Have Acted Differently by zookeeper @ 08/24/16 08:14 PM

BookSam Im so sorry to hear that you've gone through such trauma and pain. My friend it was not your fault. You were not ready for those choices and the position you were in was untenable. Please be kind to yourself, for you have many of us know exac
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Would I Have Acted Differently by zookeeper @ 08/24/16 08:09 PM

I think you doc is right Paul. Im trying so hard to break free, but Im just not there yet. I guess I was just posting my doubts and fears. I WANT to be that brave, smart liberated man, but far too often Im that frightened little boy whose wondering i
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: The Map by zookeeper @ 08/24/16 07:58 PM

FF What an incredible gift to know that our abusers cant touch us any more. Do I still know he did that to me? Oh yes. But damn his eyes, he will NEVER hurt me again! You make perfect sense my friend. I look and them and remember, and I'm not going
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Would I Have Acted Differently by sorryson @ 08/24/16 06:41 PM

Zookeeper after reading this I asked myself. I could not answer. He left me and it was over. I thought it was over except he has been with me ever since. I stopped asking myself the question because I cannot change what he did to me. Trying to ans
Male Survivors
I guess we all were victims. I was a victim of the priest teacher, I never know which trusted figure to call him, as well as one of my Mama and her family. I do not think Mama and her family knew they were victimizing us when they made Mama leave us
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: Advice Needed by SupportiveOne @ 08/24/16 06:08 PM

Reply removed. Please review the forum header. We ask that only male survivors post in this forum.
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: The Map by ForeverFighting @ 08/24/16 05:41 PM

I understand what you’re saying, Zoo. For me, the scars are validation that I was a victim. Maybe that’s messed up, but with so little reality in my young life, a scar was proof that this was real. I was injured, and if I had had a choice in t
Male Survivors
Logan you describe my life exactly ,everybody tells me it was abuse ,inside i don't understand that .maybe i do know it was abuse .convincing the kid inside that it was is another story. i didn't know it was abuse till someone told was just my
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: T says that I don't recognize myself as a victim by ForeverFighting @ 08/24/16 04:55 PM

I feel your frustration, Logan. And I hope this *is* the place to be laying out our burdens, because I do it all the time. We try to help others, and we also get feedback on our own stuff. It’s why we’re here. I don’t think it’s complaini
Male Survivors
Logan I think our denial puts us in a place of denying the abuse, thus if no abuse no victim. I learned I needed to accept I was a victim, a victim is defined as a person injured, harmed or killed as a result of a crime, accident or other event. I
Male Survivors
I saw my T today after a little break because he went on vacation. We began discussing some general stuff and half way into the appointment, he stops me as and brings up something kinda strange. He says that I have trouble viewing myself as a Victi
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts The Map by zookeeper @ 08/24/16 03:03 PM

If you were to look at my body you would see a number of scars. You might see each as a map of the times when some of the cruelest things imaginable were done to me. If you were my wife or my surgeon who repaired them, you would see the were the c
Spirituality and Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Bible Study (notes) by nltsaved @ 08/24/16 02:21 PM

Bible study (notes) 8/21/2016 What am I building in my Heart Anytime that I find myself not walking in the newness of Christ then I am walking in self. If I do not not own the things where I am weak in then I will never change those things into s
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