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Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: How I understand it by KMCINVA @ 11/19/17 10:13 PM

I found the denial process to be a long and difficult process to live through. I knew of the abuse but there were many aspects of denial--why did it happen, why did I go back and the emotions of guilt and shame I harbored. I needed to accept the tru
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Trans/Gender issues by SmartShadow @ 11/19/17 09:04 PM

Yeah that's what it's like. It is difficult to understand and make sense of but it already sounds like you are aware of having different parts or states of being. Basically the different states have there own thoughts and feelings and even diffe
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts How I understand it by FallGuy2154 @ 11/19/17 08:27 PM

Based on what I have read. Now that we are out of our denial, we go through a grieving process for what was lost. Is this accurate to your experience?
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by woodenshoes @ 11/19/17 07:33 PM

(((((((((((Nothing Man)))))))))) You are not alone in the way you feel. Ws
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Nothing Man @ 11/19/17 04:01 PM

One of my perps was 14 or 15 when I was eight. It makes me wonder what caused someone so young to offend the way he did. Had he been abused also? I cannot say, but it seems to me that what he did was learned behavior. On the other hand, my perp -
Gay/Bi/Trans Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Trans/Gender issues by SDD757 @ 11/19/17 12:32 PM

For me it's like different personality states rather than totally separate people. I thought there was just two, the normal me and the 'trucker' me. Perhaps there are more. I'm not sure how to begin to figure that out. My wife says she can tell becau
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Anyone Being Triggered With All The Media News by Ceremony @ 11/19/17 12:19 PM

Indeed Bluedogone, I second those who are asking "why now" have crossed the line into antagonizing the victim, and not addressing the real issue of the perpetrator. I commented back to three such posts somewhere yesterday, two responded, on
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: gender identity confusion by SDD757 @ 11/19/17 12:13 PM

Quote:This one that you're describing, is one I've read a bit, from a transgender blog I follow every day, and other reading and news. I'm not transgender, and know I won't be, it's a clear sense that one is definitely the wrong gender. There are how
Sexual Identity Issues
Jump to new posts Re: gender identity confusion by SDD757 @ 11/19/17 12:10 PM

Shawn, Some other things to think about is our society seems to have a hyper-masculinity. If you enjoys softer feminine things does not mean that you are any less a male. This does not mean you are on a road to becoming transgender. Gender and se
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Anyone Being Triggered With All The Media News by Bluedogone @ 11/19/17 09:24 AM

A few years ago it would have blown me away, but in comparison with some of the horrible stories on this very site it seems no more than another news story. I can process them without triggering me. What does bother me a great deal is when the inte
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Bluedogone @ 11/19/17 09:03 AM

Definitely complex for me. Of the five, two were in their teens. One of those was a couple of years ahead of me in HS, and was, I think, more about bullying a freshman than the sex. I gave him a pass, it was easy to forgive him, mostly because I la
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Anyone Being Triggered With All The Media News by genedebs @ 11/19/17 04:02 AM

Dan99, Iaccus,Seachange. KCINVA, and everybody I have had the feeling well said by Dan, If these people are so upset about their experience where is my hope. Still comparing is just a way of discounting the feelings of others who need and have a r
U.S. & World News
Jump to new posts Re: Corey Feldman speaks up again by traveler @ 11/19/17 02:53 AM

Updates: no, 1 no. 2
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by AlexBoyd @ 11/19/17 02:48 AM

Originally Posted By SuwaneeAlex, That question is deceptively complex.... For me, it is a complex situation. For those of you are who are not familiar with my background, I had three abusers: my older brother, his best friend who lived next door,
Male Survivors
Thanks, Seachange. That's just how I've been feeling too. Then, I start beating myself up for it! I've got DID and it's put the whole business right up on the front burner after a number of years of "getting along" alright. But, it IS good
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Back again by Ceremony @ 11/19/17 02:22 AM

Hi Nathan, welcome back, and it seems there are a lot of chances to discuss DID here. A thread title and just begin. Like Linear mentions interest, I've read others recently mention DID concerns. I hope you can just start it?
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Ceremony @ 11/19/17 02:12 AM

Gene, I want to offer my sorry for the experience you're struggling. Shame and embarrassment are not fair, they take over. That's why I'm sorry, it's not fair. He knew enough that that what he said would hurt you. I can say, that by 14, there is more
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Do you ever wonder "if I were loved"? by traveler @ 11/19/17 02:05 AM

Originally Posted By BDD a sense that my father was repulsed by me. that was very true in my case, except it was not my father, who had died when i was 3, but the step-dad (first and longest term abuser) who married mom when i was almost 6. he a
Off Topic
Jump to new posts Pure 1980s Cheese (cheddar?) by Suwanee @ 11/19/17 02:05 AM

Ok, this song isn't a top-shelf favorite, but it does bring back all of the awkwardness of a 6th grade dance. The DJ played it twice... Will
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Back again by NathanM @ 11/19/17 02:03 AM

Oh, I forgot...the DID used to just be a group on the regular forums, nothing special about it.
Introductions
Jump to new posts Re: Back again by NathanM @ 11/19/17 02:02 AM

Gosh, I got answers. How neat! Actually, I have had symptoms--it's just that it's been do-able for the past 5 years or so. Everybody talking to each other and working together. All the news has been the trigger, I think. And I don't have a T--the las
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: some song lyrics (maybe triggering) by Suwanee @ 11/19/17 01:54 AM

This one from 1995 hit me at a particularly important point---barely 10 years after it happened. I hate to break it to you But this convenience ain't convenient anymore Now I realize I had different eyes Back when I thought this was a good thing H
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Hard Morning by Ceremony @ 11/19/17 01:49 AM

Hi Bri, Yes, I've had the good fortune to have an imagination where I think I see them in the safe place they've been nurturing, with a safe care provider. I set that up maybe two months ago. It was complex, and now I've gotten stuck. That's the dif
Books, Music & Films for Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: Who is old enough to remember this intro? by Suwanee @ 11/19/17 01:49 AM

9 am Eastern time weekdays. Rabbit, Moose, & ping-pong balls. Will
Male Survivors
Jump to new posts Re: If your perp was a teen.... by Suwanee @ 11/19/17 01:34 AM

Alex, That question is deceptively complex.... I was 13 and the perp was 19. Six years is a large span at that age, but I still struggle with many aspects of it all. I was already well into puberty at 13, so my brain was awash in hormones. He was ba
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